![]() ![]() It could take hours before I got the endorphin rush that came with beating a boss in Dark Souls. Why did I do it? At least a heroin addict gets reliably spaced waves of pleasure out of their addiction. I responded by waiting for a while, then buying Dark Souls III. I pleaded for her to tell me where it was. Then I pressed x to reload the game.Įventually my wife hid the disc somewhere. I was overcome with loathing for every second that brought me to my position on my couch at 3am on a Wednesday morning. I wished every affliction on Earth upon the worthless skin sack I called a body the mushy bag of decomposing peas I called a brain. By the 50th, I hated myself with the burning fury of 1000 suns. The first few deaths I took in my stride. ![]() The game was poison for someone with a pathological aversion to mistakes and failure. ![]() Giant portions of my life were sucked into its yawning maw. As I wrestled to find a way to say no, a deeper, more primordial voice stepped forward in my mind and spoke: “Sure, I’ll give it a go”.ĭark Souls counts the number of hours you spend on the game. That sounded terrible for someone with already fragile mental health. He told me Dark Souls was known as one of the most difficult RPGs ever released. The paper’s gaming editor, Chris Schulz, brought me a copy of Dark Souls II and asked if I wanted to do a review. My problems started when I was working at the NZ Herald about five years ago. It’s hard work, but it’s work I know I have to keep doing, because one day I will figure out what terrible event led to me becoming addicted to the Dark Souls video game franchise*. It’s important to revisit your traumas with the help of a professional to figure out how they’ve affected your adult self. You internalise the hurt, winding it around the black recesses of your psyche, and eventually it comes out in the form of useless, harmful habits. That scene from The Neverending Story where the horse dies in a bog. A therapist will tell you many of your self-destructive behaviours can be traced back to seemingly small past traumas. Hayden Donnell shares the harrowing story of his own crippling addiction to Dark Souls. Sometimes it pays to focus on the dark side of gaming. ![]()
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |